Learning to Come Home to Your Body: Exploring Body and Sex Positivity

We live in a culture that talks about bodies all the time—and yet, so many of us grow up disconnected from our own. We learn early which bodies are “desirable,” which are “acceptable,” and which are “too much” or “not enough.” We’re taught to treat our bodies as projects to fix rather than places to live. It’s no surprise, then, that when it comes to sex and intimacy, many of us struggle to feel comfortable, confident, or even present.

Body and sex positivity aren’t about pretending we love every inch of ourselves all the time. They’re about building a relationship—one that is honest, compassionate, and grounded in respect for who we are right now.

Reclaiming the Relationship with Your Body

Our bodies hold stories—of joy, pain, survival, pleasure, and sometimes shame. Many of us have learned to tune out those stories to get through daily life. But healing often starts with listening.

When I work with clients, I often invite them to pause and notice: What is your body trying to tell you today? Maybe it’s asking for rest. Maybe it’s reminding you that you’re safe now. Maybe it’s simply saying, “I’m still here.”

You don’t have to like everything you hear. But curiosity, rather than judgment, is where self-connection begins.

Try this: The next time you catch yourself criticizing your body, pause and name something it allows you to do—walk, laugh, dance, breathe, hug someone you love. Gratitude doesn’t erase insecurity, but it helps rebalance the conversation.

Redefining Sex Positivity

Sex positivity is often misunderstood as “anything goes.” But at its core, it’s about permission and respect—for yourself and others. It means embracing your right to make choices about your body, your pleasure, and your boundaries without shame.

Sex positivity also means acknowledging that everyone’s experience of sexuality looks different. Some people find deep meaning in sexual expression. Others may identify as asexual or find connection in nonsexual intimacy. There is no “right” way to be sexual—only what is right for you.

When we release the pressure to perform or conform, we open up space for authenticity and connection.

Navigating Your Own Journey

If you’re exploring body or sex positivity, remember that this is not a destination—it’s a lifelong practice. You don’t have to do it perfectly. In fact, perfectionism is often just shame wearing a different outfit.

Here are a few gentle ways to start:

• Practice presence. Notice sensations without judging them as good or bad.

• Use language that affirms. Replace “I hate my…” with “I’m learning to care for…”

• Set boundaries that honor you. Saying no—or yes—from a place of self-trust is an act of positivity.

• Seek supportive spaces. Whether in therapy, community, or friendships, look for people who make room for your full humanity.

The Ongoing Conversation

Your relationship with your body and sexuality will evolve as you do. Sometimes that growth feels exciting; other times it feels uncomfortable. But both are signs that you’re engaging—listening, learning, and reclaiming authorship of your own story.

If you find yourself struggling with shame, disconnection, or confusion around your body or sex, you don’t have to navigate it alone. Therapy can be a space to explore those experiences safely and with compassion.

Learning to come home to your body is not a single act—it’s a practice of returning, again and again, to yourself.

If you’d like support in exploring your relationship with your body, sexuality, or self-worth, I invite you to reach out. Together, we can create a space to reconnect—with compassion, curiosity, and care.